You Are Always Casting Spells - A Spell to See Your Spell
The Difference Is Whether You Know It
In a recent session, I was mapping a client’s cosmology of love—her relationship to desire, to partnership, to the quiet longings she hadn’t yet spoken out loud. We were deep in it, tracing patterns, naming truths, letting language land in her body. And then, mid-sentence, she stopped.
She looked at me and said, “We are casting spells right now.”
And I felt it immediately—that electric yes. Because we were.
A spell, as I’ve come to understand it, is not something mystical in the way we’ve been taught to imagine it. It’s not about control. It’s not about bending someone else to your will. It’s not about whispering words into the dark and hoping something external rearranges itself. A spell is much more powerful than that.
A spell is intention, energy, and attention moving together. It’s the moment when meaning is shaped and then felt. It’s the words you repeat, the images you linger on, the stories you tell yourself about who you are and what is possible for you. By this definition, you are casting spells all the time.
My mother doesn’t like the word spell. To her, it brings up manipulation, control, something done to you. And she’s not wrong. We are surrounded by spells designed to influence us—the catchy jingle that won’t leave your mind, the smell of coffee drifting out of a café doorway, the glowing image of a couple, tanned and laughing somewhere far away. These are spells. They carry intention, direct attention, and move energy—often toward a sale, a decision, or a desire that wasn’t yours five minutes ago.
I don’t think there’s anything inherently wrong with that. But I do think it’s worth becoming aware of it. Because the moment you realize you are inside a spell, you gain the ability to choose.
What made that moment with my client so powerful wasn’t just that we were casting a spell. It was that she recognized it. And even more than that, she wanted it. She could feel that the story we were shaping together—about love, about her body, about what she was available for—was aligned. There was no grasping, no distortion, no performance. Just a quiet, steady sense of: this is the spell I choose.
That kind of awareness changes everything.
Much of the work I’ve been doing with clients lately is helping them see the spells they are already living inside of—the spell about what love is supposed to feel like, the spell about what kind of work they’re allowed to do, the spell about how much pleasure, ease, or visibility they can hold. These spells are often inherited, reinforced, and repeated until they feel like truth. But they are not fixed. They are simply well-rehearsed.
If your mind can be shaped by a spell, why not participate in that process consciously? Why not become an active collaborator in the reality you are stepping into?
This is where the work begins. First, orient to the spell you are currently living in. Notice the patterns, the assumptions, the emotional tones that keep repeating. Then begin to shift—gently and intentionally—using everything available to you.
The scents that soften or awaken you. The symbols that feel like home in your body. The music that opens something in your chest. The way you touch yourself, move, speak, and choose. From sound to scent, from symbol to sex—these are not indulgences. They are instruments.
The kind of spell work I am speaking about here is not directed outward. It is not about making someone love you, choose you, or want you. It is about becoming so deeply oriented to your own truth that you can recognize what is aligned when it arrives. It is about shifting your inner world so that what you long for no longer feels foreign. This is not manipulation. This is readiness.
At its core, this work is not about becoming someone new. It’s about seeing clearly, feeling honestly, and allowing the spell you are casting to reflect the truth that has been there all along: you are already worthy of the life you desire.
Not someday. Not once you’ve fixed yourself. Not once you’ve earned it.
Now.
Take a moment and ask yourself: What is the spell I am currently living in? Is it one I would consciously choose? If not, what would I like to begin practicing instead?
You don’t have to overhaul your life overnight. Just start noticing. Because awareness, in itself, is one of the most powerful spells there is.
A Spell for Seeing and Choosing Your Spell
Intention
This spell is not about creating something new. It is about becoming aware of what is already in motion—and choosing it more consciously.
Materials (optional, but lovely)
A mirror (small or full-length)
A candle (or soft light)
A scent (perfume, oil, coffee, tea—anything evocative)
A pen + paper
Step 1: Arrive Inside Yourself
Sit somewhere comfortable. Light your candle or soften the lighting. Bring your awareness to your breath—not to change it, just to notice. Then gently ask yourself:
“What am I currently practicing?”
Not what you want to be practicing. Not what you should be practicing. What are you actually rehearsing—in your thoughts, your body, your patterns? Let whatever comes up… come up.
Step 2: Name the Spell
On your paper, write:
“The spell I am currently living in is…”
And complete the sentence. Don’t overthink it. Let it be simple. Honest. A little uncomfortable, maybe.
Examples (just to open the channel):
“I have to earn love.”
“I am too much.”
“I am always almost there, but not quite.”
Let it land. Feel what it feels like to see it.
Step 3: Witness Yourself
Stand or sit in front of a mirror. Look at yourself—not critically, not performatively—just witnessing. And gently say, out loud if you can:
“This is the spell I have been practicing.”
Pause.
Then:
“It makes sense that I learned this.”
Let your body soften, even slightly.
Step 4: Choose a Shift
Now ask:
“What would I like to begin practicing instead?”
Not the most perfect, elevated, Instagram-ready version. Just something that feels one degree more true.
Write:
“The spell I am choosing now is…”
Examples:
“I am allowed to be loved as I am.”
“I can take up space and still belong.”
“I get to arrive, not just chase.”
Step 5: Anchor the Spell
Add one sensory element to seal it:
Apply a scent as you say your new spell
Place your hand on your heart or body
Repeat the sentence while looking into your own eyes
Take a sip of something warm while holding the words
Let your body feel the new orientation. Not forced. Not exaggerated. Just practiced.
Closing
Blow out the candle (if you lit one), or take one final breath.
And remember:
You don’t need to believe the new spell fully yet.
You only need to be willing to practice it.
***
If you’re ready to explore the spell you’ve been casting in your love life—and the one your body is quietly asking for—I offer one-on-one spell work sessions.
These are intimate, reflective spaces where we map your relationship to love, desire, pleasure, and partnership. Together, we bring awareness to the patterns you’ve been living inside of and begin to shift them with intention, language, and embodied truth.
This is work that softens, awakens, and reorients—so you can recognize and receive the kind of connection you’re truly craving.
If you feel the pull, I’d love to work with you.